Saturday, 15 October 2011

so now that its all over...

Everyone just expects me to forget about it and never mention it again.   It's like it didn't happen and I'm actually getting to the stage where I'm embarrassed if someone wants to see the photos. I keep saying "Just tell me if you're bored by these".   And it's not like I'm a wedding bore.  I'm not still going on about it all the time.  But sometimes I do mention it.  For example, the other day it was my dad's birthday.  Now, I really don't know why I bother with my dad on his birthday but I always do.  I make the effort.  I buy him a gift which he'll make a comment about and give to my arsehole of a brother in front of me.  He's incredibly ungrateful.  But anyway, we drove out there, some family members were around, my dad barely looked at his gift (a mug chosen by my gorgeous husband and a hamper of foods he really likes)  except to ask if I'd got it in a jumble sale.  Didn't even take it out of the gift bag ffs.  Sigh.  But enough about my rude father, and back to the point which is that I  said to one of my nieces "I've got a really great photo of you and your dad at the wedding on facebook." Now, it wasn't meant as an "I GOT MARRIED!!" (although asking about our honeymoon or something would have been nice from any of them - I asked about yout holiday, so at least ask about mine!!),  my intention was just that I had this really great photo, and since none of them are on my facebook, did they want a copy.  All I got was an eye roll, and a rapid subject change.  So, ok.  I know we can't talk about it forever, but it was the first time I'd seen any of them since the wedding and they could have at least acknowledge it happened cause I was starting to wonder if I imagined it.

Then there are the other people getting married.  I have no bad feelings about the girls on the wedding site getting married - I love looking at their photos, in some cases I'm really excited for them and I love seeing the plans that we've all discussed for so long coming to life.   But there are other cases where I've been really huffy - 2 in particular.  One was a girl I was at school with who got married in the same place as me a few weeks later, and the other was a girl who got engaged at Christmas and totally eclisped my proposal and wedding plans because everyone was more interested in her plans.  In both cases, I was quite pleased that my dress was nicer.  I'm such a bitch, but it just made me feel so much better.

I'm slowly getting over the post-wedding blues, although I am still sad that it's all over.  I made myself pack up my veil and put it away and when I'm ready my dress will be cleaned and packed away, then it really will be in the past.    I know that life does go on after it all and there will be many more happy moments but....I really loved my wedding and I wish I could hold onto that specail feeling for just a bit longer.